看你如此近乎瘋狂的舉動,相信你對我是誠意的,你是我的朋友,          
                                                                              
      但絕不是男朋友,此點務請察之!                                          
                                                                              
         放學回來,身體頗覺欠適,母親帶我去看病,醫生要我先去檢驗所          
                                                                              
      檢查血液,並替我打了一瓶點滴。躺在病榻,倦倦的,但總睡不著。算          
                                                                              
      著點滴落下的秒數,想著世界上的芸芸眾生。上帝是公平的,他創造了          
                                                                              
      敵人,卻也塑製了朋友,所以這個世界才會如此多的親情和戰爭。「小          
                                                                              
      姐!貴姓啊?聊聊天好嗎?」身旁的一位國中模樣的男孩打斷了我的凝          
                                                                              
      思,他側著頭,張大眼睛,似乎等著答案。一時間我有點不知所措,索          
                                                                              
      性轉過頭,閉上雙眼。難道我真的如此招蜂引蝶嗎?有時照鏡子,覺得          
                                                                              
      上帝實在待我不薄,賜給我一張姣好的臉。有人說:「美麗的女孩不會          
                                                                              
      有能力。」我總不敢否認。師長們都說我穩上雄女,但讀雄女就代表了          
                                                                              
      有才華嗎?自己總是懦弱,危及時只想依賴他人;自己總是缺乏決心,          
                                                                              
      決定事情總是不夠明快....一時之間,自己的缺點竟紛沓而至,我在想          
                                                                              
      :自己是不是只有臉蛋,沒有腦袋的女人?以致於男孩都只重視我的外          
                                                                              
      表,而忽略了真正的內在美?                                              
                                                                              
         收到信時,我想哭!寫完這封信後,卻覺痛快極了,一個長久藏在          
                                                                              
      心中的疑惑,終於得以坦然。我知道你現在很恨我,或許會不回信,但          
                                                                              
      我絕沒有怨言....。                                                      
                                                                              



發信人: Betty@sexstory (我...咬妳喔...), 信區: emotion
標  題: 轉貼[ 蓉與牧童 ] : 八                                                 
發信站: 情色文學 BBS     (Sun Jul 30 22:51:00 1995)                           
轉信站: sexstory                                                              
                                                                              
      蓉:                                                                    
                                                                              
          這幾天重複的夢境總是相同;我在大雨中追著,追著要離去的你,          
                                                                              
      好幾次快追上了,去又滑倒了,倒在地上,孤弱無力地看你的身影,在          
                                                                              
      狂與中漸漸縮小、縮小、縮小....我想吶喊,但聲音總是哽在喉頭。甚          
                                                                              
      至有一次,我已抓到你的肩頭,忽然雨滴斜送入我的眼簾,你俏麗的身          
                                                                              
      影驀然模糊,剎然,東西南北在我的腦中迴旋,我只知道狂奔,一陣陣          
                                                                              
      刺耳的喇叭聲響起,劇痛在腿上慢慢、慢慢擴大,同時你的身影又忽然          
                                                                              
      地出現了,卻是你不曾停下來的身影....你絕不可能知道那種醒來後的          
                                                                              
      感覺,彷彿不曾失落一些,卻又好似身畔的一切全都消失了,矛盾自黑          
                                                                              
      夜中向我襲來。我試圖忘了你,但你那離去的身影,卻始終令我驚慄。          
                                                                              
        但一切都消失了,自從收到你的來信之後,我自悔愚蠢無知,將一          
                                                                              
      個簡易的道理化成一場軒然大波,多麼可笑啊!把你的信看了兩三遍,          
                                                                              
      我才發現你竟是那麼的純真,將自己的缺點率然而坦。自愧於自己的自          
                                                                              
      私,沒有修養,感動之餘,我只有緊緊地握著雙手,祈禱你忘了上次的          
                                                                              
      那封信,燒了它,把它當成第一千零二夜吧!                                
                                                                              
        最近讀書越來越不認真了,常常是讀到一半,便開始幻想著我考上          
                                                                              
      雄中,你考上雄女,而且彼此都很順利地渡過了三年,然後又同時考上          
                                                                              
      同一間大學,下了課,並肩走在花叢小徑,天空或許還飄著些雨絲....          
                                                                              
      對坐在涼亭。我靜靜,仔細地端詳著你,用我厚厚的手掌捧起你溫軟的          
                                                                              
      臉蛋,輕輕數著你留著雨痕的睫毛,端詳著你淡長的眉、略鉤而挺的鼻          
                                                                              
      ,兩片柔順的唇,黑亮的髮服貼地躺在你鵝蛋型的臉上....或許很可笑          
                                                                              
      吧!這種白日夢。但你可知道?我一直有種衝動,想要在你臉上輕輕一          
                                                                              
      吻,以抒解鬱在心中的情意。                                              
                                                                              
     傲慢與偏見中,男女主角在初見面時,彼此都懷著成見,但經過談          
                                                                              
      話、寫信,他們一一跨過了隔閡,結成了一對夫婦。多美好的結局!珍.        
                                                                              
      奧斯提的這篇小說,有點純西洋式的喜劇,徹根皆甜。但真正偉大的愛          
                                                                              
      情是在「刺鳥」中,一種深銘刻骨的情意,只以外表的平靜,淡淡地刻          
                                                                              
      劃出來,最後兩人的兒子死了,洛夫也在麥姬的側伴下,靜靜走向他心          
                                                                              
      目中的天堂,看起來似乎是十足十的悲劇,但從另一個角度來看,但恩          
                                                                              
     (兩人的兒子),本來就不該來的,死了也只是歸還自然而已。而洛夫在         
                                                                              
      世上,在神和人取捨間,矛盾了數十年,終而得以解脫;去了世間最摯          
                                                                              
      愛的兩個男人,麥姬才算擁有了餘生心境的寧靜。哎!你一定很奇怪,          
                                                                              
      為何忽然向你說這些,其實自己也不甚明白,只是心中鬱鬱的。                
                                                                              
        最近忽然喜歡起喝酒了,尤其喜歡在月夜中,宿酒醒來,腦中驀然          
                                                                              
      清醒的感覺,白晝覺得憂煩的事,此時一掃而空,對著寂空,大聲朗誦          
                                                                              
      詩詞,更是一大享受。上次想著你,不自覺地竟衣服濕了,自己也搞不          
                                                                              
      清是夜露或淚水。「夜露寂來月上梢,半空猶有思滿懷;滿懷意濃濕襟          
                                                                              
      衫,露濕淚濕獨自白。」在夜闌人靜時,請你細細品味這首自作曲,也          
                                                                              
      許你就能了解我此時的意境。                                              
                                                                              
        至於你問我的問題,我無法回答。因為在我的眼中,你的一切都是          
                                                                              
      無瑕的。                                                                


 


發信人: Betty@sexstory (我...咬妳喔...), 信區: emotion
標  題: 轉貼[ 蓉與牧童 ] : 九                                                 
發信站: 情色文學 BBS     (Sun Jul 30 22:51:02 1995)                           
轉信站: sexstory                                                              
                                                                              
      牧童:                                                                   
                                                                              
          我從來沒想過這件荒唐事,而我竟然做了。上次的模擬考成績出            
                                                                              
      來了,五百四十二分,全班排不到前十名,我呆了,我從不曾考得這            
                                                                              
      麼壞的。一時悵然若失,便也想學學你的瀟灑。於是,跑到雜貨店去            
                                                                              
      買了一瓶罐裝的啤酒,付錢時,老闆娘好奇地看著我,我只覺得臉上            
                                                                              
      赤熱不已,如同火爐一般。出了店,便趕緊放入袋子裡,彷彿做了一            
                                                                              
      件見不得人的事。回到家,又看了小野的一篇小說:試管蜘蛛。竟感            
                                                                              
      動得哭了,和著考試不佳的愁緒,就真的把那瓶啤酒開了,人曰:『            
                                                                              
      借酒消愁。』不料喝了第一口,就吐了出來,這真是:初嚐酒滋味了!          
                                                                              
     過了一會兒,一種昏眩和甘沁一起冒上心頭,於是一邊喝﹑一邊吟詩            
                                                                              
     頌詞:『傷心橋下春波綠,曾是驚鴻照影來。』﹑『春蠶到死絲方盡            
                                                                              
     ,臘炬成灰淚始乾。』『梧桐更兼細雨,到黃昏點點滴滴。』『砧杵            
                                                                              
      敲殘深巷月,梧桐搖落故園秋。』『簾捲西風,人比黃花瘦。』『起            
                                                                              
      舞弄清影,何似在人間。』就這樣一面吟,一面飲,一時得失皆去,            
                                                                              
      忘形之處,竟也翩翩起舞,舞掉不愉快,舞盡生老病死,舞完......            
                                                                              
      也不知舞了多久,總之那時我醉了,醉得爛泥。                              
                                                                              
          三點多,一陣暈眩把我搖了起來,第一個反應便是吐。頭重重的            
                                                                              
      ,過了一會,才想起剛才做了什麼,只見滿桌酒跡,參考書、測驗卷            
                                                                              
      酒漬遍黃。儘管如此,心裡還是相當痛快。                                  
                                                                              
          你上次和我提了兩部名著,恰巧我都看過。唉!有時做人是不能            
                                                                              
      太執著和拘泥的。假設賣機不執著這段戀情,是否對兩人都是一種解            
                                                                              
      脫呢?假設洛夫不被宗教所拘泥,是否兩人便能共締良緣呢?其實也            
                                                                              
      不盡然,在天理之無常中,許多事物不能以價值論。如同我們吧!要            
                                                                              
      是我們都學了課內的書,而不再去進修課外書籍,不是可以省下許多            
                                                                              
      時間?他人認為書中蘊涵了人生的真諦,而吃喝玩樂只是膚淺的消遣            
                                                                              
      。我有我的看法,你也決不能影響那少數人堅持的意見,因為真理是            
                                                                              
      因人而異的。                                                             
                                                                               
         


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