kipp的部落格

妳生前我對不起妳，妳死後我依然抱著歉疚。剛離開高雄的那幾年，        
                                                                              
      每當梧桐葉落之際，我總是回去看看妳，除除雜草。後來幾載浮沈於得意        
                                                                              
      、失意之間，便忘了這個梧桐之約。大約是十五年前吧，當我回去時，方        
                                                                              
      才發現妳的墓碑幾乎已全傾頹，蔓草早已掩蓋了高起的香塚，一旁的小桂        
                                                                              
      花早也已死了，我呆了，呆坐在荒蕪野草上。後來我才知道，在你死後沒        
                                                                              
      幾年，你家人便全都遷居西班牙了。當時，在茫然中，我只隱約知道自己        
                                                                              
      是衝衝撞撞下山的，買了一把鐮刀，一個鏟子，和一些花苗。然後一面流        
                                                                              
      著淚，一面除著高過人身的草，後來實在是力竭了，乾脆便點了一把火燒        
                                                                              
      了，熊熊火燄似乎組成了妳哀怨的喟嘆，火燒的滋滋聲彷彿告訴我：終於        
                                                                              
      有人想起妳了，卻是一個未曾見過的牧童‧‧‧‧草盡了，執著鏟子，撫        
                                                                              
      平妳那被踐踏已久的香塚，如何不令人心有悽悽呢？在世為一人人皆求之        
                                                                              
      美女，一旦離世卻落得如此悲涼！                                          
                                                                              
          予你之信老提愁事，提一提喜事吧！我一直沒有結婚（有了你一生便        
                                                                              
      不再有缺憾！）在我事業成功之後，常感到長夜漫漫，孓然一生寂寞誰與        
                                                                              
      共！在偶然一次捐款中，我在孤兒院找到一個極像妳的小女孩，我毫不考        
                                                                              
      慮領養了她，那時她方才六歲！當她十六歲時（亦即去年），我帶她回高        
                                                                              
      雄妳的墓前。那時妳的墓已被我大肆整修了、地加大了，四周圍上柵欄，        
                                                                              
      鋪上韓國草，並遍植花朵─算是我對妳一點小小補償。墓碑我擅自改了：        
                                                                              
      愛妻蓉之墓。我帶她到妳那裡，並要她奉上三支香，並叫一聲：母親。她        
                                                                              
      一直都很乖巧溫順的，尤其至今，她出落得和妳當年一樣，清麗難喻。妳        
                                                                              
      在地下若有知，獲悉得此佳女，必當滿足。妳可知道我幫她取的名字？－        
                                                                              
      －宛蓉，好聽嗎？                                                        
                                                                              
      　　或許妳覺得我很癡情吧！但我知道，你也知道，『愛』是天下最難懂        
                                                                              
      的事。對於我，能夠三十年不忘懷妳，絕非是妳的容貌，而是彼此心靈的        
                                                                              
      偶然契合。『我是天空裡的一片雲，偶而投影在你的波心‧‧‧‧你記得        
                                                                              
      也好，最好你忘掉，在這交會時互放的光芒。』悲天！不知幸抑或不幸，        
                                                                              
      我卻永遠忘不了我倆短暫交會時所發出的光芒。                              
                                                                              
                                                                              
                                                                              
                                                                              
                                                                              
             在 天 理 之 無 常 ， 許 多 事 不 能 問 代 價 ；                  
                                                                              
             在 歲 月 之 無 常 ， 許 多 愛 缺 乏 酌 理 智 。                  
                                                                              
             悲 之 而 化 育 之 ， 如 淡 淡 花 綻 。                           
                                                                              
             淡 之 而 笑 置 之 ， 苦 亦 為 苦 也 ；                           
                                                                              
             莫 顧 人 生 十 五 或 五 十 ， 總 歸 戲 ，                        
                                                                              
             戲 臺 上 ，                                                      
                                                                              
             隔 著 天 窗 ， 淡 淡 月 光 入 。                                 
                                                                              
             那 兒 ，情 傷 處 ，                                              
                                                                              
             曾 擁 抱 ， 曾 落 淚 ， 多 少 茫 夜 過 ，                        
                                                                              
             總 歸 空 。                                                      
                                                                              
             這 幕 戲 末 另 幕 升 ， 幕 幕 悲 劇 幕 幕 升 ，                  
                                                                              
             直 至 人 生 無 根 。                                             
                                                                              
             那 管 曾 有 彩 霞 薄 暮 ，                                       
                                                                              
             一 樣 化 為 塵 土 ，                                             
                                                                              
             隨 風 飄 ， 隨 風 飄 ，                                          
                                                                              
             如 刺 鳥 般 ，                                                   
                                                                              
             歌 盡 身 亡 音 不 留 ‧‧‧‧‧‧‧‧‧‧‧